November 2015… was the first time I resulted in self injury, some people reading this might remember all the memories I have created throughout these years and might have been completely unaware that this was going on behind the scenes.. Others have been on this journey for the whole three years (and I couldn’t thank them enough for sticking by me) So with this knowledge here goes a new start…
I have let life for the past three years been taken over by my mental health. And it beat me down until I thought I would never see the light shine again. But I have decided three years is three too many years to let this shadow control me, hurt and abuse me. I’m pulling myself up, for the first time in these years I looked to the sunshine, I am deciding to make this change.
Medication doesn’t fix everything. Counselling doesn’t help everything. Self care doesn’t fix everything… In fact, despite how helpful and vital all these things are, there's nothing to fix. All there is to do is accept the truth and reality of it and THEN decide to do something about it.
I have to tell myself that there will minor relapses, life won’t be perfect, I won’t always be thriving, but I WILL BE SURVIVING… these past three years I could barely do that.
So this is the start of looking after myself, stop injuring myself , and hopefully find the light again.
This is recovery, and this is me. Living, despite it all.